Well, what’s it going to be? Venison or Bologna?

By STEVE GILLILAND
Exploring Kansas Outdoors

I kind of hate to admit it, but we often watch Wheel of Fortune in the evening; I guess I can justify it by preparing us for the inevitable nursing home or nursing home life. Regardless, I always laugh at the conversation between the host and the contestant who earns nothing other than the $1,000 the show automatically gives them. The host approaches them with an outstretched hand and says something like, “Well, the Wheel just didn’t cooperate tonight; I hope you had a good time. Without fail, the candidate always says “Thank you, I had a lot of fun!” »…In what universe do I believe this? You know, they tend to think “Thanks for nothing”, but that stinks! I performed like it was my first day, made a fool of myself and was humiliated in front of millions of viewers, and all for a measly thousand dollars that you were going to give me anyway!

That kind of sums up how I feel so far about this year’s deer season. I thank God every time I’m in the woods for all that He shows me and for all the wonders of His creation that He has shown me over the years, but after hunting long and hard and without harvesting of deer, I have the impression that it is a bit like that. “It stinks. Most mornings I was treated to a spectacle from one of the many hordes of blackbirds. Like the colorful “stuff” inside one of the old lava lamps, they slowly poured out and methodically over a field of milo stalks They came and went, up and down, slowly swirling and spinning into shapes that often resembled tornadoes. I always wonder what exactly they are. goal in life. Maybe a new winter Olympic sport should be “synchronized blackbird flight.” Anyway, in the end, blackbirds provided the only action most of the time. .

Deer numbers seem to be down around my neck of the woods, and other hunters in the area have felt the same way. The guy who hunts the neighboring property and I have noticed fewer deer on our cameras this year, but the number of tracks seems to suggest otherwise. If the deer are there, as the tracks seem to show, they only move at night for some reason. There were other years when I didn’t hunt deer, but at least we always saw deer in those years; it was just a matter of not being in the right place at the right time. This year there was no right place or right time. If the number of deer locally is indeed lower, I have to think that the drought that has hit our region for three years has something to do with it. Drought wreaks havoc in ways we don’t imagine or even know about. Water is essential to life, and lack of fresh drinking water can cause young fawns to die or even be aborted before birth. Diseases also result from wildlife being forced to drink stagnant, contaminated water. Lack of precipitation also equates to a lack of sufficient cover in the spring to hide and protect young fawns and other wildlife from natural predators. I’m never sure how much stock to invest in hunting by moon signs, but the moon was full or very bright for much of the 12-day season. Plus, as warm as it was, the deer didn’t have to burn many calories, meaning they needed to graze less and could have moved mostly at night.

Well, I guess I’ve discharged myself enough and I’m feeling a little better now. When I was a kid, a question my deer hunting buddies and I always asked right after deer season was, “Well, do you eat venison or bologna?” (i.e. did you get your venison or not) This year I will eat bologna. I guess on the bright side, it will give me the opportunity to test other recipes for my new cookbook “The Unsuccessful”.

Deer Hunter Bologna User Guide,” coming soon to a sporting goods store near you. Continue exploring the Kansas outdoors!

Steve can be contacted by email at (email protected).