Why don’t Tech Bros just hire from MAGA?

I remain fascinated by the MAGA-DOGE intra-party fight. MAGA’s position appears to be:

1. Elite educated Americans are bad because they’re woke or whatever.

2. The Forgotten Men of MAGA are just as intelligent and capable as these sophisticated elites with their precious “degrees.”

The DOGE position is:

3. Tech companies need more engineers than U.S. universities can produce.

4. Therefore, the government needs to scale up the H-1B visa program so that it can import more foreign engineers to work in big tech.

Because I care, I found the solution. Elon Musk, Marc Andreessen and Peter Thiel can just hire the forgotten MAGA men!

On January 19, Trump will hold a “victory rally” in Washington. I suspect tens of thousands of patriots will attend. Why not make it a recruiting event for Tesla/Twitter/SpaceX, a16z and Palantir?

I’m not a professional headhunter, but why couldn’t these people do the job as well as an Indian? Just because they don’t have a degree from a woke “elite” university doesn’t mean they’re stupid. This is America! And there is nothing the American worker cannot learn and master in no time.

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Obviously, I’m joking. The problem here is that the real MAGA and DOGE’s positions are different from what they say in public. These are, roughly:

1. MAGA: We hate elite college grads because they’re woke, or successful, or whatever.

2. MAGA: We deserve to have the same things as these elites, even if we don’t go to college or live in an urban area.

3. MAGA: What Really who keep us going are super rich guys who hate elite college grads as much as we do. We can live vicariously through them. Fantasizing about power like them makes us feel less powerless and wronged.

4. DOGE: The hippies I see on Twitter who live near me in Palo Alto are super annoying. I hate them.

5. DOGE: Why do the workers in my company want to be paid so much? Don’t they realize how lucky they are to work for me? I invent the future and they can watch it. Also, I find it annoying that these NPCs leave my Super Awesome Company for another job just because it pays more. It’s disloyal to the Future.

6. DOGE: I would like to import engineers via H-1B because I can pay them less (which allows me to devote more resources to inventing the future) and they can’t leave me for another job (which makes me waste the time I invested in them). ).

7. DOGE: Why no, I’ve never met a guy named Cletus from Alabama who had a high school education and a Confederate flag bumper sticker on his truck. I have no idea what such a person would look like.

8. DOGE: In theory, would I hire Cletus to work for my company?